Matchmaking Gone Wrong

The only two black people I know should be together

Every once in a while cupid will posess a friend of mine who will try to set me up. I typically don’t mind these attempts but occasionally someone will try to set me up with someone  just because I am black and the person is black. The only criteria is that that we are from the same race.

Years ago when I was 22, a colleague walked into my office and told me that he had a guy for me. I found this strange since I was neither friends with the colleague nor have I ever told him that I was single. My curiosity was peaked so I replied, “Really?”. He then told me that the 35 year old guy was one of our pump vendors who just returned to work after taking 3 weeks off.

“Why did he take three weeks off?”, I asked. “Well his wife died of cancer three weeks ago and they have three beautiful kids” her replied.

There were so many things I could have said but instead I gave him a quizzical look. I told him that the guy had 2 more kids than I wanted to have and 3 more than I wanted right now. My colleague replied that I’d be getting a ready made family. I kept wondering why he would think this was an appropriate match for me but then he added that the guy is Nigerian.

Suddenly it all dawned on me. The guy was black, I am black. We had nothing in common plus the earth on the poor man’s wife’s grave wasn’t even dry yet! It didn’t matter, we were two single black people.

I then replied to my colleague, “I think this pump vendor will be a more appropriate match for your 24 year old daughter, maybe you should set them up!”. He turned redder than a ripe tomato and walked away. I then busted out laughing.


Another time a Caucasian friend introduced me to his only other black friend, Trent. I asked him the reason for trying to set us up. His million dollar response was, “Well you have an accent and Trent has an accent.”

I am Jamaican and Trent is Guyanese and that’s where our similarities ended.

Dearest friends if you decide to set up two people consider their personalities, hobbies, values etc. Do not set up two people just because they are both black, Asian, foreigners etc.


Until next time

Jamaican Girl